Warning! These games will get you wasted!
Gazeboed. Smashed. Wankered. Bladdered. Drunk as fuck.
There are a plethora of different ways to describe your feeling when you hit that pinnacle of intoxication. More important than finding the words to explain your state are the choice of drinks or, most importantly games, that got you into that situation. In order to aid our readers in their quest for optimal drunken performance we’ve compiled a list of our favorite drinkin’ games to use on a night out.
Grab your deck of cards, cassette player and maybe even a marker pen to join us on a voyage the like of which you’ll never have been on before…
5. Beer pong
This is the ultimate head to head/team drinking game for the competitive drinkers amongst us. In pairs each team sets out an assortment of cups of liquor at their end of the table. It’s then the aim of the opposing team to get a ping-pong ball into your cups. If they do, you drink. There really isn’t a lot else to it. It’s one drinking game where if you practice you can avoid getting absolutely wasted. Who would want that?!
Materials – Beer, long table, plastic cups, ping pong balls.
4. Edward Ciderhands
If you don’t enjoy a delightful 3 litre plastic bottle of cider then we have to admit that this one won’t be for you. Who doesn’t like one of those everyone once in a while though?
The basic premise is that to “win” you must finish six litres of the stuff without having to go to the bathroom. Strategies in the past have involved chugging one and then attempting to use the urinal with the “empty” hand or even finishing the two canisters as quickly as possible. In truth there isn’t really a strategy when you have two bottles of cider duck-taped to your hands.
Materials – Duck tape, two three-litre bottles of cheap cider each, a willing bladder.
3. Ring of Fire.
No list of drinkin’ games is complete without this one. Widely recognized amongst University students as the game, it’s so good as it can incorporate a series of other games all into one. Like a compendium of board games, only that you play all of them at once and it does make the ultimate game if you have enough people willing to play seriously. The cards are assembled around a central vessel to form the “ring of fire” and from then on it becomes personal to the setting your in with one exception – the king means you pour drink into the central vessel and the last king pulled out has to down the drink. Played three times on the trot it’ll have you on the floor
Materials – A pack of cards, a centre vessel, 5+ participants,
2. Power Hour (UK – Centurion)
The North American version of this game was brought to my attention by none other than Becky Liggero just yesterday when I realized that Power Hour was simply a more fun sounding version of the British classic, Centurion. Power Hour entails creating a mix tape with a minute clip of each song and at the end of each time period you down a shot of beer. It last for 60 minutes and ends with you sprawled over the floor. Over the Atlantic we’re a bit more hardcore with Centurion lasting for another 40 minutes with every tenth shot regularly replaced by a spirit. I’m not gonna lie, aome of the heaviest nights have involved the “fun” this game involves. You have been warned.
Materials – Bowl (to decant beer into), one shot glass each, a tape player or computer with a Centurion countdown.
1. The Soccer Saturday Drinking Game.
For the UK’s legions of self-styled #LADS this game is the ultimate badge to obtain if you end up finishing it. For anyone that has no idea what Soccer Saturday is, it consists of a group of panelists watching games on televisions and reporting back to the host when something happen. The game itself takes place on a Saturday afternoon and gives every self-respecting male, or female, the excuse to drink heavily in the middle of the day – as if an excuse was ever needed anyways! I can honestly say I’ve never got any further than about 10 minutes into the second half with this one given the amount of liquid involved. Anyway here are the rules and come the new season give it a try for yourself.
- Goal = 1 shot of beer
- Red Card = Shot of Jager
- Chris Kamara is talking = You are drinking
- Merson Rhyming Slang = Shot of Jager
- Swindon Town appear on Vidiprinter = Last person to shout “Mackerel” downs a shot
- Dundee appear on the Vidiprinter = Last person to shout “Football” takes shot of Jager.
- Northampton Town appear on the Vidiprinter = Last person to shout out “Cobblers” takes a shot of Jager
- Phil Thompson mentions “Stevie Gerrard” = 3 shots of beer
- Jeff makes an “A Trialist” joke = 3 shots of beer
- Your team scores = 2 shots of beer on top of the one for a goal
- Jeff calls Kenny Deucher “The Good Doctor” = Shot of Whisky
- Any hint of racism (social or otherwise) from any of the pundits = Quadruple jager bombs all round
- Hartlepool score = 3 shots of beer
- Pundit shouts off camera = 2 shots of beers
- Le Tiss is mentioned in the same breathe as takeaways = Shot of Jager
- Chris Kamara says: “It’s unbelievable Jeff” = All drinks must be downed
- Jeff says “It’s Doom and Gloom at…” = Shot of Jager
- The team ‘Keith’ referred to as just being one guy = Shot of jager
- Brighton & Hove or Dagenham & Redbridge are jokingly referred to as two different teams playing the same oppo = Shot of Jager.
- Anything bad happens to Craig Bellamy (injury, og, booked, arrested for assault etc.) = 2 celebratory shots of the spirit of choice.
- If a James Brown related joke is made = Last person to sing “I feel good” must down drink
- Any talk of Man City “Buying the title” = Down your beer.
There you have our five favorite drinking games. We want to hear what your favorites are, so use the comments box below to let us know how you get your drink on!